Delivering Disappointing Performance Reviews – PART 2

Posted by Sarah Hobbs

You may well encounter some challenging individuals when undertaking your performance reviews. Some people are difficult, particularly when you’re giving them bad news. So what are some of the reactions you might get, and how should you handle them?

1. People who are indifferent. I’m sure you’ve encountered people in your team who, whatever you say, however frustrated or impassioned about the issues you are, there’s no visible response. First thing to remember – and to sense check – is whether they genuinely are indifferent, or if they are just an inward processing introvert with a good poker face. The temptation here is to try to assert yourself, or to provoke a response by being emotional or over the top, or sometimes to just give in. Given that sometimes the person doesn’t even realise how they’re coming across – telling them how their reaction lands with you is a good response. The key is to not let their response affect you or to drain your energy. Remember that when delivering the news is not for them to leave feeling motivated – that takes time to rebuild, and you’ll do it by following up and focusing them on the future. Your aim is to be clear. Make sure that you’ve set out what you wanted to get across in the meeting.


2. They were really angry. One of the easiest things to do in this situation – and you’ll be sorely tempted – is to respond in kind and get angry back. Stop a second and remember that you didn’t cause their performance issue or this response – so don’t get caught up in it. Studies have shown that if you can understand their anger, this makes it easier to deal with. Say that you can see they are frustrated, and ask what is causing their frustration? Listen really carefully while they speak and show that you’ve heard them by repeating some of the things they’ve said. You don’t have to agree with their worldview, but show that you understand what they are saying. All this will make them feel heard, and increase your insight into why they are responding in this way. Keep calm, lower your voice, and try not to go for clichés. Ask them how they would like the situation to be addressed or how you can help them – this makes them feel that they have some control. If does get too bad, remind them of the professional nature of the environment – or even be prepared to terminate the conversation. Sometimes that act alone can have a huge impact on dissipating the anger.


3. People who always disagree. Try to understand the source of the disagreement – they believe that they have a point. Some believe what you’re saying may be “unfair”, “wrong” or “incorrect” – so how can that be addressed? Some people will disagree because they don’t understand – so how do you help them see? Or is it just that they disagree because it’s you saying it, because they feel the need to be better than you or to be perceived as better than you? The key is not to feel bad or to take it personally, instead to make sure you stay in a positive place. This will allow you to truly understand the disagreement for what it is and to be able to help them. While ideally you would hope to come to an agreement, bear in mind that some people never will. As long as you’re challenging yourself to understand and to think about whether they’re right, you might sometimes just have to pull rank and record your view of the situation and their performance as their manager. One sensible approach can be to say “Clearly we disagree here. What I suggest is that we work out a way of monitoring this, so you can prove that you are meeting this requirement.” Now instead of arguing whether they have done it in the past, you can focus on how they can prove they are meeting the standards you set in the future – and isn’t that all you really want – someone who is dead set on achieving the right standards? Even if their motivation is to ‘prove you wrong’!


4. They say “yes” and they don’t do it. This can be really frustrating, but it’s often a learned behaviour than an actual weakness. Their experience of you maybe that they’ve been able to do this in the past – so ask yourself if you follow up on agreements that they make and actions that they agree to? Also, be sure to challenge them when they don’t deliver – if they think that you won’t, and they happen to be very busy or lazy, they may well procrastinate or avoid. You might find chasing people up time consuming and difficult, their lack of proactivity may frustrate you. For now, they are your team member and you need to manage their performance. By chasing for things, you’ll either convince them that it’s easier for them to do it than to be hounded – or it will allow you to gather enough evidence for the ensuing disciplinary process. Also consider whether you can put the work into their court. Perhaps you can ask them to put in a report every week before their 1-to-1 with you what action they have taken that week? Then if they don’t do that, send them away until they have done it? They’ll soon learn that certain things have to be done.

TAKE AWAY
There are naturally people who are going to be more difficult to manage and keep on track than others. Thinking about that in advance and how you will handle those situations is time well spent.