The mentoring ‘contract’ and why it matters

Mentoring others is a great way to give something back to the organisation, to help others develop their career, and to learn things ourselves by gaining different views and perspectives to those we might usually be exposed to.
mentoring-support Published 30th November 2020 The contracting framework below will help you establish and conduct the mentoring relationship in a healthy, mutually respectful way.

1. The mentoring contract can be formal or informal, written or unwritten. It is underpinned by a discussion that needs to take place between the mentor and mentee and will help ensure the relationship gets off to a positive start.

2. What are the objectives of the mentee? What are they hoping to gain from their mentor? This is important to know so you can decide whether, as their mentor, you can meet their expectations, whether you are the right or best mentor to meet their needs.

3. What responsibilities should the mentor and mentee have? For mentors, it’s:
  • To listen and observe
  • To ask open, constructive questions
  • To share your experience along with other perspectives
  • To respect your mentee’s experience
  • Not to be judgemental
  • To keep confidences – unless legally obliged to speak out
  • To support your mentee to find their solutions to any problems they face

For mentees, it’s about:
  • Respecting the opinion of your mentor – which can be different from agreeing with it
  • Not abusing your mentor’s position by asking for favours
  • Not asking your mentor to over-rule or contradict your line manager
  • Taking notes if required
For both it’s about:
  • Honesty and discretion
  • Being respectful of each other’s views and time
  • Keeping the discussion confidential
  • Being punctual for meetings

4. The contract can specify the number of meetings, the time and date of those meetings and the location. The location should be suitable for confidential professional conversations. If mentoring someone remotely, specify the technology to be used.

5. Line manager involvement – if both parties are working for the same organisation, it will be worth discussing and agreeing how the mentee’s line manager fits within the mentoring relationship, whether they are to be given updates on progress by the mentee or not. Certainly, you will need to be clear that, as the mentor, you are not there to over-rule or contradict your mentee’s line manager in the event of any conflict between them.

6. What if the relationship doesn’t work out? Some organisational schemes will have an Administrator to intervene if any issues arise between the mentor and the mentee. If not, the contract can state that if for any reason, the mentoring relationship is not progressing as hoped by either party, then notice can be given. This may arise if a mentee is relocated, if a mentor is promoted to a new role and has less time available, if the relationship breaks down or the anticipated rapport is never developed. Whatever happens, you will want an elegant, blame-free, exit strategy that doesn’t hurt either party and respects and keeps the conversations had, to date, confidential.

7. What if the original objectives change? At this point is it worth revisiting point two above. Are you still the right mentor? Do you have the skills and experience to support your mentee with this new agenda? If not, use your exit strategy.

8. What if you become concerned that the issues your mentee faces are too deep or complicated for you to handle? This could be especially true of factors affecting someone’s mental health. Knowing when you are out of your depth is essential. If this happens, talk to your mentee openly and honestly about your concerns and offer to help them in finding the right support, perhaps talking jointly to the HR team.

9. If your mentee wants to extend the mentoring relationship beyond the time or number of meetings specified or anticipated originally, decide whether you can agree to this request. Do you have the time and the right experience to give them? Do you enjoy working with them sufficiently to want to extend the contract? If so, review your contract, amend as appropriate and move on from there. If not, be honest about needing to keep to your original agreement.

10. Outcomes – whatever happens in a mentoring relationship, the responsibility for action taken remains squarely with the mentee. As a mentor, you can suggest and advise but never impose your views. It is for the mentee to be empowered, to make the right decisions for them and to be responsible for the outcome of their choices and actions. Always keep this in the forefront of your mind.

TAKE AWAY
Mentoring others is immensely rewarding, stimulating and a fantastic way to develop your coaching skills. It’s about supporting others growth, ability to make informed choices, to develop their skills and insights and steer their career in the direction they desire. Having a mentoring contract will help you get this relationship off to a great start. Good luck!