Responding to Criticism
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Dealing with criticism can be one of the most challenging parts of working with other people. Here are some quick tips and ideas to help you manage and learn from even the most critical feedback.
Search for the kernel of truth in any criticism. There is always something in there to base it on and learn from – make sure you find it.
- Is it really criticism, or just very honest feedback? One of the important things to remember is that the way you see criticism often depends on the person who gave it to you and the perception you have of them. If you like them it will be feedback and if you don’t, it will be criticism.
- Remember there is a degree of inevitability about criticism. There’s a great Elbert Hubbard quote, which goes “To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing and be nothing.” If you accept criticism is inevitable and something everyone receives, you’ll find it easier to not get upset by it.
- Remember from a career point of view – it’s all useful. Whether you see it as criticism or feedback, the important thing is to learn from it. As Winston Churchill said – “Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfils the same function as pain in the human body. It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things.”
- Don’t react badly when it’s given. A great tip from “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People” is to leave a gap between the trigger (the feedback) and your response. Think of it as the management equivalent of counting to ten – and use it to choose your response rather than reacting instinctively.
- Search for the kernel of truth. No matter how the feedback or criticism was delivered, remember there is always something in there to learn from – so make sure you find it. Even if it’s just learning about a perception some people have of you.
- Play it back to some people you trust. Don’t overreact to feedback you disagree with. Discuss it with people whose opinion you trust (and who you know will be honest with you). This will help you get a sense of perspective and find out whether other people share the view or if it’s just that one person’s opinion.
- Work hard to change or manage it. If it is something that is a blind spot to you and people have confirmed it, think about how you can change or manage it. And once you’ve “fixed” it – deliberately highlight it so people know you’ve gone out of your way to address their feedback. This tactic also does a lot to enhance your reputation.
Search for the kernel of truth in any criticism. There is always something in there to base it on and learn from – make sure you find it.