Get your views heard!
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Do you feel that you don’t get your views heard, or make a strong impact in meetings? Here are three quick tips to quickly improve your gravitas – that sense of presence and measured power that gets people to listen to you.
Ask people which of these three things you need to work on most. Then experiment with these suggestions and see if they help. You don’t have to ‘change who you are’ – but you do need to develop a ‘high impact mode’ for when you want people to stop talking and listen to you.
For more articles like this take a look at 6 Positive Ways To Stand Out In The Workplace and Instant Gravitas, The Handshake.
- Get their attention
Very often people find themselves in meetings waiting for an opportunity to get their point across in a fast-flowing conversation. This happens particularly to people who come from family backgrounds where it is polite to wait until someone has finished speaking before starting to speak. But in some meetings everyone seems quite happy to chip in with different points before the other person has finished. There is never a moment’s polite pause in which to speak! Finally, in desperation you might try to leap into a tiny gap to get your main point in quickly. But if you do, you are frequently talked over, the conversation staggers to a halt, and then you have the embarrassment of having to start again and repeat your point.
If you struggle with making your point in a meeting or being talked over, you have TWO jobs to do, not one. The first is to flag up that you have something to say. For example, lean in, rest your hand on the table in view of everyone, and open your hand into a starfish shape for a moment, to indicate you have something to say. This helps to catch people’s eye, and observe that you want to speak. If that doesn’t work, try combining the starfish with a short interruption then stopping – for example, “If I could make a point here…” Then pause. It might take a few seconds, but they will give you their attention. The second job is to make your point. If you want to establish gravitas, never start on your point until people have given you their attention. - Speak in complete sentences.
Speaking in complete sentences is a skill that demonstrates the clarity of your thinking. An easy way to improve is to jot down a few bullet points on what you want to say, before you start to speak. An example of someone not being clear sounds like this.
“When you speak if you want to be powerful – sometimes people talk for quite a long time – they may cover a number of subjects and each statement is really important – and you want to have people hear what you say – sometimes people digress in different directions and speak much too fast… you need to be sure that you come to a conclusion too – because otherwise people will rarely feel clear – even though you have several good points, numbering can help…”
If this is you, you need to work on being more structured, and more concise. Don’t try to tell the group everything in your head at once. Instead, give a few clear points then stop. You’ll get a chance to elaborate on them later. So the above ramble would become…
“It’s important to establish gravitas by talking in a very clear way. Firstly, try numbering the points you want to make, as this helps people listen. A slight pause after the point helps people to digest it. Secondly, each sentence should have a single idea and come to a clear conclusion.” - Project your voice, and slow down
People are often unaware of the volume at which they speak. If you want to increase your impact, and be credible, you have to be easy to hear. Around 25-30% of people are talking much too softly. The key to getting your voice level right is consciously thinking about projecting your voice as if you’re talking to the person furthest away from you.
Ask someone you admire for their confidence in meetings to give you feedback on how much louder you can speak. It will feel like shouting to you at first, but if you are continually getting feedback that you could be louder, you will adjust your expectations and realize that speaking up is just a skill that you need to be seen as confident and credible.
Also find out if you are talking too fast for people to process what you are saying. If so, practise talking at a slower pace.
Ask people which of these three things you need to work on most. Then experiment with these suggestions and see if they help. You don’t have to ‘change who you are’ – but you do need to develop a ‘high impact mode’ for when you want people to stop talking and listen to you.
For more articles like this take a look at 6 Positive Ways To Stand Out In The Workplace and Instant Gravitas, The Handshake.